Wednesday, May 25, 2011

Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 3 Reveal Trailer According to BadCod

There are people all over the web hyper-analyzing the latest trailer for Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 3.  They're breaking it down frame-by-frame, guessing at plotlines, speculating about characters, and predicting what might end up as multiplayer maps.

Since you've heard all that, I'll take another approach.  Watch the trailer and then I'll give you my "Top Ten Observations of the Reveal Trailer from a Bad Call of Duty Player":

Okay, here's my Top Ten:

  1. Wow, I should really go back and play the single player modes for Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2 and Call of Duty: Black Ops.
  2. Am3rica, 3ngland, Franc3, and G3rmany, eh?  I'm guessing lots of urban environments in single player means that there will be lots of urban environments in multiplayer.
  3. Urban environments means lots of buildings.  Buildings means lots of indoor play.  Lots of indoor play means that there's a good chance I'll experience video game motion sickness.
  4. I would love it if they got Ice Cube to do voiceovers again... but this time with a French accent.
  5. Crashing on a subway train would really suck.
  6. I'm hoping there are very recognizable sections of New York to run around.  That would totally shorten my learning curve on new maps.
  7. I know it wouldn't be contextually correct or even remotely realistic, but I would love to be able to equip a big-ass sword as my secondary weapon.  If you're going to let me have a Ninja Perk, let me be more ninja-like!  
  8. Tangentially related, I noticed that the "France teaser trailer" is currently the only Modern Warfare 3 teaser trailer with fewer than one million views.  Do people really just hate France?
  9. I fear that CoD: MW3 is somehow already making people stupider with comments like: "TO ALL YOUS WHO GET BONNER YOU SHOOD GET A LIEF BCUS U SUK A PHALLUS".
  10. CODMW3's release date is November 8, 2011... that means we can kill people online before AND after stuffing ourselves with turkey.
Any other bad Call of Duty-ers out there with more thoughts?